Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Playing Well With Others Is Not My Forte.

The sun is shining in the Northeast Kingdom of Vermont, which means the park is beckoning not only to my children but also to a large majority of the children in the area. Park days are full of sunshine, sunscreen, dirt coated children and moms, a lot of moms. Moms who love nothing more than planning play dates, enabling them to spend the day chatting with each other while their children run wild with little supervision.  I am not one of these mothers.

            The past week has been full of spontaneous park visits due to a string of pleasant days. It was during one of these spontaneous trips to the park with Lily-Anne that I ran across one such group of mothers. As I followed Lily from one contraption to another, I watched this group of mothers sit chatting with each other, their children either abusing the playground equipment and the other smaller children in the area by barreling along carelessly or disappearing from sight completely. My disdain took flight, and I was reminded of why I am, by choice, somewhat of a loner, or at least socially selective.
           
            When I express my frustration at these situations to my husband he always repeats the same line, “Honey, you do not play well with others.” Humorous, yet true. I was never one to like partner or group work when in school. As a teacher, I despised assigning group work despite my administration’s insistence on doing so. I have never been one to “be a part of the crowd.” I never had an overwhelming desire to join a sorority, be a team player (despite playing basketball), or jump on one of the numerous bandwagons the public so enthusiastically embraces. I have never wanted to be part of the moms club.

I blame my apathy on a variety of personality quirks. I am somewhat of a control freak. I like things done in a certain way in a certain amount of time. I have very little patience for bullshit. I have very little patience for drama. As I once told my husband, "I have enough drama of my own, I do not need other people’s drama on top of it.” I like intellectual, grounded, and honest individuals, which excludes a whole host of mothers who want to do nothing more than rave about the joys, and ignore the stresses, of motherhood and marriage.


  Fitting in is simply not a part of my nature. Rather I choose to surround myself with a small group of individuals, individuals who are real and honest. Individuals who do not ask me to apologize for who I am, or rather, who I am not.

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